“That’s why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they’d call them something else.” – Samantha Baker

“I can’t believe I gave my panties to a geek.” – Caroline Mulford

“What’s happening, hot stuff?” – Long Duk Dong

“It’s my little sister’s first date, and the little twerp thinks he’s gonna get lucky.” – Mike Baker

“You couldn’t buy a clue during clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.” – Sam Baker

“I can’t believe my parents didn’t wake me up for my own wedding.” – Ginny Baker

“Oh my God, I love Jake Ryan! I mean, I’m obsessed with him. I’m totally weirding you out, right?” – Samantha Baker

“I got a serious boner for this girl in my French class.” – Ted

“I’m sorry, I don’t have a purse.” – Samantha Baker “I’m love wrecks your life. It makes you feel inadequate.” – Grandma Helen

“Life goes by pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.” – Jake Ryan

“Jake, what are you doing? I can’t believe you’re letting him feed your son.” – Caroline Mulford

“I can’t believe I gave my panties to a geek.” – Caroline Mulford BE A SHARK QUOTE

“I asked Santa for a car, as well. But I don’t think he expects me to start paying for it until I’m ” – Jim Baker

“Jake, honey, I want you to meet Samantha Baker.” – Caroline Mulford

“She doesn’t even know I exist. Like that Austrian guy – you know, that guy…” – Geek

“When you get older, your heart dies.” – John Bender

“You want some raw meat?” – Long Duk Dong

“We have a cake. We have a band. You bring the guests.” – Samantha Baker

“Do you know how popular I am? I’m so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school.” – Caroline Mulford

“I’m in geek hell!” – Ted

“Oh yes, they fuck. Just like monkeys, Sam.” – Bryce

“Relax, would you? We have 14 hours before the wedding. Just relax, take a pee or something.” – Mike Baker

“I feel like such a hosebag!” – Ginny Baker

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